Yup - well I rang that school that my friend had the interveiw for. Boy! here's the two quotes I am still steaming about:
"integration is ideal when it is feasible" - not my emphasis - ain't that a can'o'worms??? and
"I just wanted you to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel after those 4 years" so - hmm - definitely not pro inclusion in kindy I guess.
What do I make of it? I was encouraged to come and have a look at the transition program. It is one that I know has a good reputation. How do I feel about her ringing the mag in response to my letter?
Well as my DH prophesied when I first told him - and how it surprised me given my friend's experience there - it's a marketing exercise. When I rang him rather cranky about it all this afternoon - he just repeated that. I know - it means nothing to me because that school wasn't on my radar anyway. I don't want a school with a great marketing plan I want one with a great philosophy. Still what about my friend and her little girl? They had long ago settled on this transition program being the bees knees - they just hadn't considered what on earth to do until then...
Me I wonder at the level of 'integration' mentioned as available in the program given that they are so resistent to it in kindy for goodness sake - we are talking kids who have a mild intellectual disability, and speech delay but they do talk, have great receptive language, can follow routines, stay on task, are toilet trained - what planet are these people on? What is the philsophy of education? I don't think it is for me - even if I could afford it.
My school of choice might be looking at me a bit nervously - but they aren't saying 'no' (yet) - they have a fundamental philosophy that I like and that I think/hope will work in our favour.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Monday, May 25, 2009
A Story in 5 parts
Part 1 Fear
I have been to a couple of 'information sessions' for parents of children with special needs about starting primary educaton. At each session the nerves and fear, the tension each parent feels is palpable to me - even over the clamour of my own anxieties and I admit near hysteria on occassion. We are the new recruits. We are tired from all that EI. From adjusting our families and facing the world every day as the parent of a child that is 'different'.
The speakers have been older more experienced veterans. The Bogart and Bacall crew. They have a blunt battle weary message. It isn't always uplifting. Yet they bring such hope. They cope. Their kids cope. Life goes on. It is just another battle front - and overall once you find the right fit - it seems to operate as at least a truce between the parent and the school.
These old soldiers share their battle tactics with us - take notes, don't go alone or you'll get ambushed. Do reconnasance. Advocate. Persist. Stand strong. You can do it.
It's comforting but also daunting.
Then there is the other information session - the bureacratic one. We are all more anxious here. This one is run by the people who can help us. The ones in the know - who understand the system - from the inside. The session is spent trying to weigh up what we hear. How much is genuine? How much is bureauspeak? What will it all mean for my child? So many questions and of course no answers at ths stage - just more information, another piece of the puzzle.
Part 2 Anger
My DH calls me a loon - one those crazies who fire off diatribes to any poor fool who has to lend me an ear. I write a letter. I know it is emotive - I write it in anger and tears, adrenalin fueled. I don't show it to anyone. It is cathartic. I am not really like that - I wait. I edit carefully. I am aware of the inadequacies of my words. The traps. The contradictions. I don't want to offend the educators I have spoken to - yet I do want to give them a good shove. They are not 'bad people' in this scenario, still I think it doesn't hurt to remind them that in the mill of enrolments for next year - they might have some rather antsy folk like myself - in need of mercy and/or compassion. I want guarantees. I want information now. I am trying to read through the 'public speak' to the person beneath the professional persona. I need an allie. I am on the HUNT for one.
Part 3 Action
here it is - identity slightly less concealed - I am applying to these schools after all!!! I can't afford to scare them or offend them. I think they are good schools.
Dear editor
I read last month’s education issue with great interest as I have twins who will be starting school next year. I am on the open day treadmill as I type having visited an infants school earlier in the month and a local catholic school today with three other open days still on the to do list.
The whole process is disheartening and incredibly daunting. In spite of having been a high school teacher for nearly 20 years I found myself in tears raging, wondering what is the point of education?
Both schools I have been to have been are perfectly adequate and have good reputations locally. What I don’t understand is why educators aren’t beating down my front door. You see one of my twins has an intellectual disability. She has Down Syndrome. Here are professional institutions with a passion for learning – so why is it that they aren’t amazed and interested in my daughter’s progress?
I want a place where my daughter is welcome. Why do I have to negotiate with a school to accept my daughter and then try and stuff her into their square hole – my beautiful, fun loving, hard working little girl deserves so much more than that.
I get the theory that my daughter belongs in a regular classroom. I believe it too. The state expects her to be in a regular classroom and so do I but without adequate support and expertise we are setting her up for failure. I discussed this reality with today’s Principal – and oh yes she understands that point very well too yet the mother in me cries out to teachers and principals like her - why oh why couldn’t you say – “yes I know but we are really keen here on adapting to meet your daughter’s needs. We will go out of our way to help her adjust and meet her potential.” Instead at both schools they have been quick in linking me to various bureaucratic requirements such as IQ assessments that may get her some funding for support.
Why is it always about how she will fit in instead of how they are going to do their jobs and draw out at least some of what she is capable of? It’s not that hard – I’ve been doing it ever since she was a baby – and she is remarkable. She also has significant speech delay, takes longer to respond to questions while she processes what she is hearing and then forms an answer and is far better at visual cues that just spoken ones.
Today I am tired and I am upset. Neither school have done anything ‘wrong’ but they have been acting to their formula and I feel like I have to ‘prove’ my daughter worthy rather than they convince me that they can meet her needs – that they have that standard of excellence. All the gifted and talented programs and the Smart boards in the Sydney wouldn’t be able to compete with that. Now that would be a school that educates.
Part 4 Solidarity
You gotta love another special needs mama. We are a gang - in the best sense of the word! A couple recognise my writing. One Mum who I don't know that well but who lives nearby has a duaghter with DS (her daughter is fairly similar to Hannah - with obvious individual differences but overall they are pretty well matched). She is looking for a school for her for next year. We compare notes. She comments (as one of my other friends has also done - and which I totally agree with!) that this is so hard. It has taken her by surprise how hard it is. She wakes up worrying about it in the night. She has been reading and reading on it. She has been setting up interviews at as many schools as I if not more. Like me she got lulled into thinking it would all be ok - when it happens. We got over the shock of the diagnosis of our daughters and got on with admiring their every achievement. Now we are being asked to focus on their differences, their weaknesses. [I hope I haven't misrepresented her thoughts here]. One school got a particular mention. It has a great reputation and a particular class for older kids with special needs (as do a number of gov schools in our area). I was surprised to hear that the interview didn't go so well as she had hoped. The school had not seemed as accommodating as she had expected. They are better prepared for older children with an intellectual disability. Well, that was her perception anyway.
Part 5 - Sharing the Burden
The most glaring inadequacy of my words is that they don't acknowledge the best intentions of the schools I have spoken to. Anecdotally I have heard of parents receiving fairly pointed "have you considered school xyz.. the anywhere but here school". I got none of that. What I did get though was not enough to settle half of my fears - and I think that process needs to be improved. It shouldn't feel like this. Imagine my surprise at the coincidence, the school that my friend had mentioned so briefly - had contacted the magazine. They had talked about their programme and left contact details to be passed onto me as they thought that I might be interested in what they have to offer.
I will ring them - We disguised my identity very loosely by omitting the reference to twins. I don't want them second guessing the author as this other Mum. I stand by what I wrote but that doesn't mean that I don't have any regard or respect for what schools do - I am a teacher after all! It's just that sometimes I think they need reminding that they are in the business of learning and that every child has the right to that. Yes they need to be able to meet the needs of the particular child but that shouldn't become the excuse to hide their fears and insecurties and prejudices behind. Children like ours, especially if they get a 'mild' result in their assessment can really be left with very little - when clearly they could do amazing things - with support.
I have been to a couple of 'information sessions' for parents of children with special needs about starting primary educaton. At each session the nerves and fear, the tension each parent feels is palpable to me - even over the clamour of my own anxieties and I admit near hysteria on occassion. We are the new recruits. We are tired from all that EI. From adjusting our families and facing the world every day as the parent of a child that is 'different'.
The speakers have been older more experienced veterans. The Bogart and Bacall crew. They have a blunt battle weary message. It isn't always uplifting. Yet they bring such hope. They cope. Their kids cope. Life goes on. It is just another battle front - and overall once you find the right fit - it seems to operate as at least a truce between the parent and the school.
These old soldiers share their battle tactics with us - take notes, don't go alone or you'll get ambushed. Do reconnasance. Advocate. Persist. Stand strong. You can do it.
It's comforting but also daunting.
Then there is the other information session - the bureacratic one. We are all more anxious here. This one is run by the people who can help us. The ones in the know - who understand the system - from the inside. The session is spent trying to weigh up what we hear. How much is genuine? How much is bureauspeak? What will it all mean for my child? So many questions and of course no answers at ths stage - just more information, another piece of the puzzle.
Part 2 Anger
My DH calls me a loon - one those crazies who fire off diatribes to any poor fool who has to lend me an ear. I write a letter. I know it is emotive - I write it in anger and tears, adrenalin fueled. I don't show it to anyone. It is cathartic. I am not really like that - I wait. I edit carefully. I am aware of the inadequacies of my words. The traps. The contradictions. I don't want to offend the educators I have spoken to - yet I do want to give them a good shove. They are not 'bad people' in this scenario, still I think it doesn't hurt to remind them that in the mill of enrolments for next year - they might have some rather antsy folk like myself - in need of mercy and/or compassion. I want guarantees. I want information now. I am trying to read through the 'public speak' to the person beneath the professional persona. I need an allie. I am on the HUNT for one.
Part 3 Action
here it is - identity slightly less concealed - I am applying to these schools after all!!! I can't afford to scare them or offend them. I think they are good schools.
Dear editor
I read last month’s education issue with great interest as I have twins who will be starting school next year. I am on the open day treadmill as I type having visited an infants school earlier in the month and a local catholic school today with three other open days still on the to do list.
The whole process is disheartening and incredibly daunting. In spite of having been a high school teacher for nearly 20 years I found myself in tears raging, wondering what is the point of education?
Both schools I have been to have been are perfectly adequate and have good reputations locally. What I don’t understand is why educators aren’t beating down my front door. You see one of my twins has an intellectual disability. She has Down Syndrome. Here are professional institutions with a passion for learning – so why is it that they aren’t amazed and interested in my daughter’s progress?
I want a place where my daughter is welcome. Why do I have to negotiate with a school to accept my daughter and then try and stuff her into their square hole – my beautiful, fun loving, hard working little girl deserves so much more than that.
I get the theory that my daughter belongs in a regular classroom. I believe it too. The state expects her to be in a regular classroom and so do I but without adequate support and expertise we are setting her up for failure. I discussed this reality with today’s Principal – and oh yes she understands that point very well too yet the mother in me cries out to teachers and principals like her - why oh why couldn’t you say – “yes I know but we are really keen here on adapting to meet your daughter’s needs. We will go out of our way to help her adjust and meet her potential.” Instead at both schools they have been quick in linking me to various bureaucratic requirements such as IQ assessments that may get her some funding for support.
Why is it always about how she will fit in instead of how they are going to do their jobs and draw out at least some of what she is capable of? It’s not that hard – I’ve been doing it ever since she was a baby – and she is remarkable. She also has significant speech delay, takes longer to respond to questions while she processes what she is hearing and then forms an answer and is far better at visual cues that just spoken ones.
Today I am tired and I am upset. Neither school have done anything ‘wrong’ but they have been acting to their formula and I feel like I have to ‘prove’ my daughter worthy rather than they convince me that they can meet her needs – that they have that standard of excellence. All the gifted and talented programs and the Smart boards in the Sydney wouldn’t be able to compete with that. Now that would be a school that educates.
Part 4 Solidarity
You gotta love another special needs mama. We are a gang - in the best sense of the word! A couple recognise my writing. One Mum who I don't know that well but who lives nearby has a duaghter with DS (her daughter is fairly similar to Hannah - with obvious individual differences but overall they are pretty well matched). She is looking for a school for her for next year. We compare notes. She comments (as one of my other friends has also done - and which I totally agree with!) that this is so hard. It has taken her by surprise how hard it is. She wakes up worrying about it in the night. She has been reading and reading on it. She has been setting up interviews at as many schools as I if not more. Like me she got lulled into thinking it would all be ok - when it happens. We got over the shock of the diagnosis of our daughters and got on with admiring their every achievement. Now we are being asked to focus on their differences, their weaknesses. [I hope I haven't misrepresented her thoughts here]. One school got a particular mention. It has a great reputation and a particular class for older kids with special needs (as do a number of gov schools in our area). I was surprised to hear that the interview didn't go so well as she had hoped. The school had not seemed as accommodating as she had expected. They are better prepared for older children with an intellectual disability. Well, that was her perception anyway.
Part 5 - Sharing the Burden
The most glaring inadequacy of my words is that they don't acknowledge the best intentions of the schools I have spoken to. Anecdotally I have heard of parents receiving fairly pointed "have you considered school xyz.. the anywhere but here school". I got none of that. What I did get though was not enough to settle half of my fears - and I think that process needs to be improved. It shouldn't feel like this. Imagine my surprise at the coincidence, the school that my friend had mentioned so briefly - had contacted the magazine. They had talked about their programme and left contact details to be passed onto me as they thought that I might be interested in what they have to offer.
I will ring them - We disguised my identity very loosely by omitting the reference to twins. I don't want them second guessing the author as this other Mum. I stand by what I wrote but that doesn't mean that I don't have any regard or respect for what schools do - I am a teacher after all! It's just that sometimes I think they need reminding that they are in the business of learning and that every child has the right to that. Yes they need to be able to meet the needs of the particular child but that shouldn't become the excuse to hide their fears and insecurties and prejudices behind. Children like ours, especially if they get a 'mild' result in their assessment can really be left with very little - when clearly they could do amazing things - with support.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
I went to observe the kindy classroom in our 'school of choice' last week. It looks great. I knowthat Han will have some issues settling in and I know they will need to make some modifications in their teaching to best suit her - but boy - they already have so many strategies in place that will really suit her.
So there we have an old building - a big classroom for 2 classes (dividers there but rarely used). 50 kindy students, 2 teachers and 4 parent 'helpers' on this particular morning. When I arrive one of the teachers is just finishing up whole class instruction on reading. There are an array of groupings (based on abilities and personalities) of oranges, cherries and the likes. Behind her is alarge notice board - it has the picture of the different groups. Next to each pic is the names of the kids in that group and then 1 or 2 visuals of what activities that group is to be working on. The children are dismissed and go to their various 'stations' that have been set up. There will be a ringing bell and one more change over. Before they move off into the second lot of group work Miss V calls them together - they do a brief listening game. It is like one that the brats play in their music class. The leader claps and then the class copies. The teacher chose a range of kids to have a turn.
While I was there I saw one parent volunteer hand over hand modeling writing for a little boy. Another was outside in the hall going over some sight words. Another was helping the kids who had to write a story and draw a picture to go wiith it. The last parent was helping kids cutting and pasting in a picture sequencing activity.
Lots of phonics and whole sight words - perfect for Hannah - and enabling Kit to go at his own pace.
Hannah's psychometric assessment is in two weeks and then a couple of days later the principal (from the 'school of choice') and a special needs support teacher will do a 'functional assessment' at the preschool.
The preschool teacher has had a visit from the EI special needs teacher - it went well and early reports are that some of the suggestions have already been implemented. (That doesn't surprise me as I know the teacher is good - it's just that Han gets no funding support which means that the teacher is working with her first child with DS with no additional support or training - that seems to be the 'mainstream way' in NSW where a diagnosis of T21 is not a sufficient disability to receive targetted funding) - ah that is a whole other post - which I will include soon as I have an update to include - just haven't worked out how to best protect anonymity in doing so.
So there we have an old building - a big classroom for 2 classes (dividers there but rarely used). 50 kindy students, 2 teachers and 4 parent 'helpers' on this particular morning. When I arrive one of the teachers is just finishing up whole class instruction on reading. There are an array of groupings (based on abilities and personalities) of oranges, cherries and the likes. Behind her is alarge notice board - it has the picture of the different groups. Next to each pic is the names of the kids in that group and then 1 or 2 visuals of what activities that group is to be working on. The children are dismissed and go to their various 'stations' that have been set up. There will be a ringing bell and one more change over. Before they move off into the second lot of group work Miss V calls them together - they do a brief listening game. It is like one that the brats play in their music class. The leader claps and then the class copies. The teacher chose a range of kids to have a turn.
While I was there I saw one parent volunteer hand over hand modeling writing for a little boy. Another was outside in the hall going over some sight words. Another was helping the kids who had to write a story and draw a picture to go wiith it. The last parent was helping kids cutting and pasting in a picture sequencing activity.
Lots of phonics and whole sight words - perfect for Hannah - and enabling Kit to go at his own pace.
Hannah's psychometric assessment is in two weeks and then a couple of days later the principal (from the 'school of choice') and a special needs support teacher will do a 'functional assessment' at the preschool.
The preschool teacher has had a visit from the EI special needs teacher - it went well and early reports are that some of the suggestions have already been implemented. (That doesn't surprise me as I know the teacher is good - it's just that Han gets no funding support which means that the teacher is working with her first child with DS with no additional support or training - that seems to be the 'mainstream way' in NSW where a diagnosis of T21 is not a sufficient disability to receive targetted funding) - ah that is a whole other post - which I will include soon as I have an update to include - just haven't worked out how to best protect anonymity in doing so.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Kit's enrollment interview
The principal of the school we hope to send the twins to rang last week. She and the special needs support educator had decided on a date to doa functional assessment on Hannah at the preschool.
Her suggestion was that we do Kit's interview straight away as she had done most of the other ones already. Hannah's would take more time. So last Wed I dropped Hannah at her prep for school program and I took Kit up to complete his enrollment interview. DH left work to meet us there.
All went well. I had no idea what would happen but luckily I ran into a Mum I know through the brats' long day care and she had already had an interview at that school (as well as 2 other catholic ones in our area). She mentioned that the principal tries to gauge where the child is up to.
So given that she has already spent at least 40 minutes with us discussing Hannah's special needs, the niceties of the meeting went smoothly. DH got the impression that the point of the interview was really to assess us - and that may well be true. I don't mind - I felt that it was a positive one and even when Hannah was mentioned briefly I got the sense that it was in a 'planning we need to do for her' kind a way rather than a 'if we take her' kind a way. Fingers crossed anyhow!
So after chatting to us, asking us about Kit's milestones for walking and talking as well as how we'd describe him and what things he likes to do. She asked a few questions about our reasons for choosing a catholic education and her school in particular. She also asked about how we discipline Kit and how we view education.
She then sopke to Kit. She has a lovley manner with the children and obviously genuinely enjoys watching them and educating them. He had to name the colour of various pencils - she asked him about 2 blue pencils (which he'd correctly identified as blue) and he was able to say that one was a lighter blue than the other. He then counted them (24) into the pencil holder and when she asked him to keep counting he went up to 29 before he got stuck. He had to name the basic shapes (circle, square, triangle, rectangle); demonstrate he understood small and big, short and long. He was shown the numbers 1 - 10 and had to point at the one she asked for. He was then given some blocks to build something with - he built a dog, a tower and a building. She asked him what games he played at preschool (powerrangers ??? I didn't even know he knew anything about those ones - I don't!) and then he named his friends from preschool.
The conclusion of the interview was no surprise. He is 'school ready' as they say in the trade. He certainly is. I think he's gonna love school.
Now we are onto Miss Hannah's paperwork....
Her suggestion was that we do Kit's interview straight away as she had done most of the other ones already. Hannah's would take more time. So last Wed I dropped Hannah at her prep for school program and I took Kit up to complete his enrollment interview. DH left work to meet us there.
All went well. I had no idea what would happen but luckily I ran into a Mum I know through the brats' long day care and she had already had an interview at that school (as well as 2 other catholic ones in our area). She mentioned that the principal tries to gauge where the child is up to.
So given that she has already spent at least 40 minutes with us discussing Hannah's special needs, the niceties of the meeting went smoothly. DH got the impression that the point of the interview was really to assess us - and that may well be true. I don't mind - I felt that it was a positive one and even when Hannah was mentioned briefly I got the sense that it was in a 'planning we need to do for her' kind a way rather than a 'if we take her' kind a way. Fingers crossed anyhow!
So after chatting to us, asking us about Kit's milestones for walking and talking as well as how we'd describe him and what things he likes to do. She asked a few questions about our reasons for choosing a catholic education and her school in particular. She also asked about how we discipline Kit and how we view education.
She then sopke to Kit. She has a lovley manner with the children and obviously genuinely enjoys watching them and educating them. He had to name the colour of various pencils - she asked him about 2 blue pencils (which he'd correctly identified as blue) and he was able to say that one was a lighter blue than the other. He then counted them (24) into the pencil holder and when she asked him to keep counting he went up to 29 before he got stuck. He had to name the basic shapes (circle, square, triangle, rectangle); demonstrate he understood small and big, short and long. He was shown the numbers 1 - 10 and had to point at the one she asked for. He was then given some blocks to build something with - he built a dog, a tower and a building. She asked him what games he played at preschool (powerrangers ??? I didn't even know he knew anything about those ones - I don't!) and then he named his friends from preschool.
The conclusion of the interview was no surprise. He is 'school ready' as they say in the trade. He certainly is. I think he's gonna love school.
Now we are onto Miss Hannah's paperwork....
When I finally gave birth to my first and only children in 2004 I was ecstatic. I started blogging at the Shamptons a few years ago. I found it great to give myself a bit of space to process some of the things I was dealing with in life and on this parenting journey in particular. Having twins is fantastic - really!! I highly recommend it. In fact I feel a bit sorry for the proudly pregnant mama's I meet with only one baby in there!
I thought the first year of being mum to my beautiful twins was the hardest - in terms of illnesses, suregery and adapting to what Hannah's diagnosis of Down Syndrome would mean for our family as well as what being parents of twins would do to our longstanding DINK lifestyle. Now I find that the venture into mainstream education is a significant crisis. This blog is dedicated to recording some of our experiences on that journey. I hope it might help others who follow me along this path.
I should note that at the moment I cannot say for sure that Han will go to mainstream school although that is certainly our goal - so I hope I haven't jinxed us before we have actually enrolled the twins in a regular school. I have put in application for enrollment forms. That will ahhve to be enough for now.
I thought the first year of being mum to my beautiful twins was the hardest - in terms of illnesses, suregery and adapting to what Hannah's diagnosis of Down Syndrome would mean for our family as well as what being parents of twins would do to our longstanding DINK lifestyle. Now I find that the venture into mainstream education is a significant crisis. This blog is dedicated to recording some of our experiences on that journey. I hope it might help others who follow me along this path.
I should note that at the moment I cannot say for sure that Han will go to mainstream school although that is certainly our goal - so I hope I haven't jinxed us before we have actually enrolled the twins in a regular school. I have put in application for enrollment forms. That will ahhve to be enough for now.
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